OBAMA MEETS THE THREE STOOGES ON SPEECH NIGHT

What would have happened if Obama's "Pass that Bill," crapulence had been speechified with Moe, Larry, and Curly in the room.
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Obama: "We've got to pass this bill for the passing of the bill in order to find out what will happen if we pass this bill right now!"

Curly Howard: "Huh?"

Obama: "Yes, you must pass this jobs bill, and we can put people to work. Pass this jobs bill, and thousands of teachers in every state will go back to work. Pass this job bill, for the sake of passing this jobs bill and the jobs will sprout from holes in the ground."

Curly Howard: "What? You trying to give me the doubletalk?"

Obama: "Pass this bill," and we'll have shovels digging in the dirt, we'll be investing in our infrastructure and if we pass this bill and the bill is passed and the passage is right now, people will rush back to work as soon as tomorrow morning if we pass what we must pass when we can pass the bill to passage."

Moe Howard: [To Curly]: "What's he saying?"

Curly Howard: [To Moe]: "I don't know what he's saying, he's talking pig latin."

Obama: "I'm saying that we must pass the bill to pass the bill in order to get the shovels ready to start investing in our infrastructure so that when we pass the bill, we can find out what's inside of it and it'll only cost a half a billion but we must pass what we must pass."

Larry Fine: [To Moe and Curly]: "Spread out you guys, I"ve got this one." [To Obama]: "Oday ouya eakspee igpay atinlay?"

Obama: "You will pass it in the day and you will pass it in the rain. You will pass it because I say and you will pass it for the gain."

Moe Howard: [Grabs Larry by the hair and pulls him back]: "Get outta the way porcupine, I'll handle this." [Steps forward to Obama]: "Okay wise guy, spill it straight or I'll squeeze the cider out of your adam's apple!"

Obama: "When you pass the bill for the sake of passing the bill, Americans will go back to work to invest themselves in our infrastructure and it will be less than the trillion we spent last time but more than we should be spending for the sake of spending to spend."

Moe: [To Obama]: "Listen, you onion head, you march yourself in here and start talking in circles. What gives, ya nuts?"

Curly: "Hey fellas, I found it."

Larry: "Found what?"

Curly: [holds up shovel]: "A shovel ready for a job! NYUK NYUK NYUK NYUK!"

[Moe pokes Curly in the eyes, grabs the shovel and throws it away, hitting Nutsy Pelosi in the head, knocking her more senseless than normal.]

Moe: [to Larry and Curly]: "This guy's nuts. If he was traveling on his wits, he would not get out of the front door."

Moe: [To Obama]: "Were you ever indicted?"

Obama: "Not since I was born in Nairobi."

Moe: "Well you oughta be." [to Curly and Larry] "My dear fellows, this is our punishment for associating with the hoi polloi." [They rise and walk out of the Congress.]